Gold Bugs I

Stop hiding secrets in jewelry boxes
with your finest turquoise pieces,
prized possessions from a vacation,
a former home — I never asked.
Can you see me reach my hand to you,
and still hold too loosely?
Can you feel me slip and turn away?
I am only gone a moment;
I must search for another
rare golden bug we have discussed
for so many hours, silently.
I found one in France,
in the heat of a Provincial market.
I cried when I heard you valued that trinket.
Where should I go next?
Egypt, where they have lovely scarabs?
Maybe I should simply spray a cicada shell,
a false and dazzling interpretation.
It seems important to find these tokens;
they enhance your warm face
and make you smile.
Smile more!
When you do, I feel warm
and I long to search for more bugs.

Notes

Written 4 February 2000 in Tulsa, Oklahoma.

Brian Fuchs, “Gold Bugs I” from Scissor-tailed Flycatcher (Scissortail Press, 2020)

Original Version:

Gold Bugs Pt I
for G, who is always with us

Beautiful and unpredictable woman,
stop hiding your secrets in jewelry boxes
with your finest turquoise pieces – prized
possessions from a vacation, a former home
(I never really bothered to ask).
Can you see me reach my hand to you,
and still hold on too loosely? Can you
feel me slip away and turn away?
I am only gone a moment – I must
search for another of the rare golden bugs
we have spent many hours discussing,
all the while making no sound.
In France, I found one (and cried when
I heard you valued it). Where next?
Egypt, where they have lovely scarabs?
Or should I simply spray a cicada shell? –
a false, but dazzling interpretation.
It seems important to you (and is to me)
that I find these tokens, these treasures.
They enhance your warm face and make you
smile. Smile more – when you do I feel
warm and I decide to search for more bugs.

2.4.2000

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