By:
On:
With: 0 Comments

Life is too damn complicated!!!
So, it was brought to my attention by way of big orange sticker, that my tag was way expired. I hadn’t really thought to check, since I got the car in December. Oh well… but I had no money to switch the insurance into my name and my parents didn’t want to continue the policy. I really needed to do something. I finally negotiated with my dad for him to go get the new tag, I would pick it up, and I would pay him back.

After work, I rode with Lori home because she offered to take me to Stillwater (an hour away), but she wanted to change clothes first. When I got upstairs, my electricity had been shut off. Apparently, I didn’t pay it last week like I thought. I was so irritated, but I called and paid. Of course it was too late for today.

Lori drove me to Stillwater and we only stayed briefly. On the way, I asked about sleeping at her house. A formality really, as I have fallen asleep there before. We finally got back to Tulsa at 9:45. I was feeling sick again, but this time there was the feeling of vomiting. It didn’t happen.

Back in my dark house, I took a shower by dim candlelight and daydreamed about not having electricity at all. Life would be so different… Went to Lori’s, tried to sleep, tried to sleep, tried to sleep, slept. I woke up unhappy, late, in pain, and with no patience. My illness is not a going away. I feel slightly better, but there is a dull abdominal pain involved now. I think I am fine, but will take care of it when proven wrong. Blah.Continue Reading

By:
On:
With: 0 Comments

Still Awake!
I cannot sleep and I feel like crap. I think I am getting a cold. THIS SUCKS. I didn’t leave my house at all yesterday thinking that might help. It did not. Now, I missed all the rain yesterday and I am still sick. Blah. One of these days my body will work correctly.

Music Recommendations For Meghan:
Elgin Park : Elgin Park
Jude : No One Is Really Beautiful
Jude : King Of Yesterday
Scissor Sisters : Scissor Sisters
Rufus Wainwright : Want One
Wheat : per second, per second, per second…every second
Fuck : Cupid’s Cactus
The Triplets Of Belleville soundtrack
Jim White : No Such Place
Blur : Best OfContinue Reading

By:
On:
With: 0 Comments

Justin:
I am super happy because Justin has a Xanga. I am on a mission to have everyone I know on here apparently. I think he could really use it though… he has a lot to get off his heart, what with his DID or schizophrenia or whatever he has this week… I love him so much. What an excellent friend.

Me:
I discovered that I absolutely love hand massages. I love them almost as much as having my neck and shoulders clawed. It just hurts so good. Yay. I just need to find someone to massage me 24/7.

Car:
I really need to get my tag up to date… it is way expired. But I need some damn money. Blah. I also need some new insurance. It is still under my parents plan, since they gave the car to me. I just hate spending money on this crap… but I guess I have to. I really don’t want a ticket/have my car towed. This place sucks. Oh well.

Music:
I was given this list of recommendations from Meghan. I thought I would not only share the suggestions, but my thoughts on them, as I am sure she would be interested.

The Kings of Convenience : Quiet Is The New Loud
♣I was planning on purchasing another album by this group already… They are amazing!
The Format : Interventions & Lullabies
♣This was really very good!
Iron & Wine : The Creek Drank The Cradle
♣Excellent disc. Would need to think about purchasing, but I do like it.
Yo La Tengo : I Can Hear The Heart Beating As One
♣This took me back to high school too much. Maybe it is because it is from that time, but it reminded me of too many groups, without the satisfaction of a memorable song.
The Sea and Cake : One Bedroom
♣Eh… okay.
The Starlight Mints : Built On Squares
♣This is an awesome disc… at the moment. I fear it may be too novel for me and I would hate it after a short run.
Damien Rice : O
♣Had it, loved it, got old (played in-store), gave it away, only like 1 or 2 songs now.
Teitur : Poetry & Aeroplanes
♣Didn’t get to… will soon.
Eliott Smith : Either/Or
♣Didn’t get to… will soon.
Beck : Sea Change
♣When this CD was released, I mentioned to someone that I wasn’t ready for it. I knew that I would eventually enjoy it. That time has come. I listened again and love it.
Beck : Mutations
♣I didn’t listen, but I love everything Beck does!

I am coming up with a list for her now…Continue Reading

By:
On:
With: 0 Comments

Xanga:
Yay! I fixed my jacked up Windows Media Player… now I can visit xangas with music on them again. It had been locking up my browser. Whew…

I also started a “family friendly” xanga (uncle_bri). I am trying to get my mom interested in this, but don’t need her to read everything I write. I tend to reveal too much on here sometimes.

LiveJournal:
I have finally figured out everything and have come to the same conclusion. It just isn’t as good. More people, but not as good. I did run into someone I know on there. Meghan. Anyway, I am glad to understand it.

Money:
I really don’t want to upset people, but I will with this. My money is mine. I can spend it the way I want, regardless of others impressions of how much money I should have or how much stuff I shouldn’t. I do make mistakes, and I want to be corrected if an obvious oversight has been made, but if I want another DVD, that should be okay. I just feel belittled by constant “mothering.” Blah. At the same time, I don’t mind discussing things, but I think there is a problem when I feel the need to hide things I buy in my own home. Sorry, person who knows they do this. I have been so busy trying to make everyone else’s life easier (parents, brothers, co-workers…) that I left me out and have been miserable for a while now.

Being Miserable:
I started doing it again, and I hate it. Thoughts that need to go away. I haven’t been this uncomfortable being me since high school… and that was terrible. I think I am just feeling that life is purposeless, what with everyone I know dying or having major problems. Life sucks, but the weird thing is that I am in fairly good spirits. I am just apathetic, complacent, drained, and emotionally numb. I hope I have hidden it well, but I guess this pretty much puts it all out there.

I will be fine.Continue Reading

By:
On:
With: 0 Comments

Stupid Locks!
When I got home from work yesterday, the guys who came in to caulk the windows had locked the lock I don’t have a key to! Blah. A guy working here had to get a ladder, climb up on the balcony (which I had unlocked), and open the door for me. It only took 45 minutes to get in… SO IRRITATING. Then, I went over to Lori’s. I didn’t take anything with me (except my phone) and left the door open because I was pretty tired and really just staying for dinner. I fell asleep. I woke up to my alarm clock on my phone… still at Lori’s. I quietly left, locking her door behind me. When I got to my door, IT WAS LOCKED!!! So I went to Lori’s, thinking I would have to wake her up somehow. Fortunately she was already up. She let me in and I located my keys on the computer desk. Now, here is the irritating thing. Jess locked it. Jess came over to use the computer (and she is welcome to enter when she wants and use the computer when she wants), but the keys were sitting right in front of her!!! Why would she lock the door, knowing I didn’t have my keys? Blah. I am sick of being locked out of my house now…

Work:
I am down to 2 employees… EGAD! I really need some new people, and then one of them was acting like she was looking for a new job. She assured me yesterday that she was not quitting (THANK GOD), but was looking to get a full time job somewhere else, making her available only on weekends. That is good AND bad. She is the closest thing I have to a lead. It’s okay; this will make her happier. Blah. It’s rather like a mass exodus at work right now, and we seriously need to start hiring.

Drama:
There seems to be a lot of drama in my life right now. My family has some issues, and I just pray everything goes well. KC gets tubes put in her ears on Thursday (she is only nine months). Jess keeps going into labor and can’t have the baby until after this coming weekend. September 17 is the due date… can we say “not gonna make it!” Mom is working towards her goals of being sober. I am super proud of her. Bradley lost his new job. I feel so bad for him because he is such a hard worker. Blah.

Bills:
Oh yeah, I am supposed to pay those, huh?

Big Brother:
The house is irritating me right now. I think that everyone is trying hard to be diplomatic, seeing as opposing sides were once in a strong alliance. It isn’t working and a lot of people are powder kegs. I think that Will is so great and I hope he gets to stay. Nik, Will, or Marvin are my current favs to win. A twin needs to go next week though!

Amazing Race:
I have really watched so little of this that I wasn’t too invested. However, I need to stop now that my favorite team was eliminated. Blah.Continue Reading

By:
On:
With: 0 Comments

Music:
I am super happy!!! I just discovered that Jude released a new album, but not in stores. Blah. I ordered it from the place he offered it and can’t wait to hear it!!! He is awesome and I hope he gets back to more of a No One Is Really Beautiful feel. Yay Yay Yay!!!Continue Reading

By:
On:
With: 0 Comments

Boys:
Blah. Where are the boys?

DVDs I can watch over and over:
•Boondock Saints
•Donnie Darko
•Office Space
•Moulin Rouge
•Friends (any season)
•Queer As Folk (any season)
•Will & Grace (any season)
•I’m The One That I Want – Margaret Cho
•Metrosexuality
•Futurama (any volume)
•Zoolander
•Dogma
•Adventures Of Priscilla Queen Of The Desert

These aren’t necessarily my favorite movies, just what I tend to pop in. Now, that’s a list that makes me look gay!

Work:
Our store manager is back from her vacation. Hopefully, she had a great time and will be a joy to work with. She usually is anyway. I think I have decided that I definately want to come into a large sum of money so I will never have to work again. It would be nice to be independantly wealthy, even if I continued to work. Blah. I guess that is the American dream though: to be filthy rich and sit around all day.

Mom:
I am reading Straight Parents, Gay Children to see if my mom would benefit from it, and I really think she would at this point.Continue Reading