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Happy C******s Day, all!
I am feeling kinda weird today. I spent the day feeling sick because I started eating. I should have done it more gradually, but I rushed into it. Oh well. I was back at work today after a 4 day vacation. It was a little irritating seeing what didn’t get done, but I will just crack the whip this week. I do have a new employee who I work with tomorrow. My department doesn’t have the turn over the rest of the store has so a new person is a big deal. I did discover that the DVD section needs to be further expanded, which is both frustrating and exciting because the section started out so small and has taken over.

Movies:
Lori and I are watching movies again. Sleepy Hollow and Ernest Scared Stupid (unless I can get out of that one somehow). I did see the USA Frankenstein movie last night. It was okay, but I wanted more. It sould have been a mini series instead. They tried to cram too much in. Edit 11:54: We ended up watching Underworld, which Jess had. It was okay. I am not that interested in Vampires and Werewolves, but it was appropriate. I made meatloaf, which took forever to cook (because I turned the heat down instead of up when I need to). I think it made it more moist. It was sooo good. I enjoy throwing stuff together, but I never cook. It was the second time in the three years I have known Lori & Jess that I cooked for them. Not that meatloaf really counts either. It was a good evening.Continue Reading

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Weird Day:
Today has been a little weird, but nice. I got no phone calls and was able to just sleep on and off throughout the day. I watched TV and ordered out. I didn’t even have to leave the house. I started getting frantic phone calls at about 10. Apparently, everyone had been calling all day and my phone wasn’t ringing. I don’t know what was wrong, but after being yelled at by several people, I don’t even care. I think sometimes people can just calm down. Why do my parents suddenly need to hear from me everyday? The assumption that I am dead is irritating, but at the same time I am glad they care. I think they need to relax and let me live my life without being so paranoid all the time. My dad even said tonight “someone could have been dead and buried by now.” Blah. After one or two days, I would hope that they would just drive over if it was so important.

Happier Things:
I have been giving a lot of thought to the changes I want to make in my house. It is very cheery and bright which definitely has its place in my life. It has made me quite happy and hyper at times. However, I am ready for a much more adult look and my yellow and green walls will become light blue. Everyone loves my orange walls, including myself, but I might change them too. I will leave them to see how they look with the blue and if I don’t like it, I will change them to brown. I won’t be losing the punches of color, but that combination may be more soothing for a living room. I really got this plan in my head while coming up with a plan for Travis’ house. My colors are different from the ones used in the guest bedroom plan, but in the same family. I really can’t wait. I would love to do the blue in beadboard, but I am afraid that would cost way too much. Especially since I have the tall walls across from the loft. We’ll see. When I decide to do it, i think I will post before and after pictures on here.

I am excited to do some grocery shopping. I have been reluctant to do any for some time now. I think part of the problem is that I moved after finding a store I really liked and the ones around me aren’t the same. But the store I really like is right next to my work, so there should be no problem in going right after work sometime. And I am one of those strange people who really likes veggies. I need to get some and just make dinner for myself. It has been a long time since I used my kitchen.Continue Reading

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Rain:
Glorious rain!!! I love it… I really do. I could sleep all day just having the sound of rain outside my window. I already slept for 15 hours today, so I think I might back off and just enjoy it while I am awake. We need more storms this year.

Secret:
It all seems like a dream now. Too long ago to remember the details even though it was just last weekend. HINT 2: I have done this with all but 1 of my friends.

I am still a nerd!

Vacation:
I am on my mini vacation now. It started when I left work yesterday, but since I slept all day I say it starts now. I have almost nothing planned, which is great. I think I will go to Lori’s this evening, Stillwater tomorrow to see the family, then Saturday and Sunday I will probably just hang out at home, with a brief break to go out to the Majestic. I need to get some friends to go with me, but I doubt that will happen. I will spend Saturday cleaning I think. I know I keep saying it, but even I hate to be at my house right now. Blah to my house. So I need to do something. Hang the curtains I got, clean the floors, take stuff to Goodwill. Lots to do.Continue Reading

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Voting?
I am sitting here listening to this most painful rhetoric coming from my television. I strongly believe in “anyone but Bush,” not necessarily backing any certain person. When offered John Kerry, by way of nomination, I backed him. But I still don’t agree with Kerry 100%. And now I can’t decide if I should get out and vote or just let Bush take Oklahoma without my opposition, which would not make a difference anyway. I also cannot even choose a candidate based on interest in my own life. Kerry is not our strongest defender, as gays. It drives me nuts that this is where we will be for the next 4 years. I am so tired of a group of people with larger numbers than most other minorities is being ignored. With the exception of the Hispanic community, gays and lesbians are the largest minority group in the U.S. But we have no voice — no real support.

I didn’t choose to be gay; I didn’t choose to be alive; all I can do is make the most of what has happened to this world and pray that one of these days (maybe after I am gone), gays and lesbians will gain the right to be happy. It will happen, so why make those here today suffer.

I am feeling very political today, in spite of myself.Continue Reading

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Sick:
I was sick all weekend. I started feeling ill Thursday night and didn’t feel better until today. Blah to that. I know I am sick all the time, but this was stomach related. I was also avoiding the phone during that time. Saturday we went to dinner for Jess’ birthday. We had a lot of fun until I ate and became a yucky again. But I am feeling quite well today, albeit a little tired.

Secret:
I didn’t share something with any of my friends and it is exciting. It isn’t good or bad, just a secret. Technically, 2 people know. It is exciting just to keep stuff from people sometimes… oh, and to talk about the fact that I am doing so. HINT: “I’m an…”

I am such a nerd!

Work:
The store managers’ conference is over and we have ours back. Some of her stuff was mailed and haven’t yet arrived. I love this part of the holiday season. She got some fun stuff for me last year since it was my 5 year anniversary with Barnes & Noble, but I expect run-of-the-mill-still-cool-cause-its-free stuff this year. It is nerdy to want promotional crap, but I do.Continue Reading

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DVD:
I finished season 1 of Ellen (technically These Friends Of Mine). I had forgotten how dramatically the look changed throughout the 13 episodes in that season. Hair, clothes, characters, sets… I don’t think that Anita was given a chance to really shine. Maggie Wheeler is hilarious, but her character had very few opportunities to show it. Holly improves as the season goes by, but should have gotten the axe sooner. I really like Adam though. I am glad he lasts a little longer. It is weird that the only character that makes it through the entire series is Ellen herself. Can’t wait for season 2 in February!!!

Money:
I went to consumer credit counseling. They were not able to help. Apparently, you have to overextend yourself with more places to qualify for help there. I understand it, but I really don’t know what I can do about it. I need $6,000 yesterday and seemingly no way to get it. Blah.

Job #2:
I have not heard back from anyone, but still have some applications to take back. I really want to clear up my life so I can be financially content again.Continue Reading

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Weather:
It is so nice out in the evenings lately. I love fall because getting colder is so much more satisfying to me than getting warmer. I can’t wait for winter.

Money:
I am still stressed over the whole issue (and mainly because nothing has changed). I have done well at not spending any money though. Even the Ellen DVD I got today was an exchange from something I purchased in July. I want the money issue to go away, but I know that it won’t just because I ignore it. That may just make it worse. Blah.

Stress:
Stress seems to be going around lately. It was out in full force today, with the exception of Lori. Her moods never seem to follow the normal pattern. Funny girl. There is just so much to do at work that I need to stop and think out a logical sequence or I will never get it all done correctly. It is driving me nuts… nuts, I tell ya. Really, things are fantastic… considering.Continue Reading